Do You Really Need Them?
Saturday, November 4th, 2006
If I haven’t mentioned about it before, firstly I have something to confess…
My life has changed since the day I had my eye brows done at a salon more than a year ago. It hurts so much as five minutes work was in place. But I see that day as the ‘point of no return’ for me as I transform slowly towards a beautiful swan1. Next things I bought were eye shadows (I’ve got seven colors now), perfumes (gosh I’m starting to be scent fetish!), face mask, pore pack, foundation, and mascara. Needless to say, they are ‘must have’ stuffs for women and surely can be found in their make-up kits. Did I say to you that it has been an evolution? Then I lied… It’s been happening for 18 months, short enough to be called a revolution?
All my friends at high school and college probably know best the reason why. I was not appearance oriented girl. For me it was brain that counts. I didn’t have lip balm until I reached 20 (I wore lipstick just after I got the real job), first awareness of body lotion and face powder at the age of 19. Gosh I hope I don’t sound like telling you I was a nerd J Well I was, and arguably I still am. *blush*
Although most my old friends are surprised when they see me now (with that look of ‘wow, is this the ugly duckling I knew many years ago?’), the only thing I wear every day is face powder, lipstick, and high heels. Nothing more than that. So what about those eye shadows, foundation and mascara? If they came alive and could talk maybe they would beg to be other’s and cursed me as a geek that doesn’t have any sense of beauty. Now why I keep having things that I don’t need? And the list is longer and longer each day. Maybe tomorrow I’ll buy blush on when my insanity gets the best of me. I have ‘tomato chubby cheeks’ so why the hell I need blush on??? *scratching head*
Sadly this also applies to me in different areas of my life. It’s just the fact I have to accept that I always choose things or people I can live with, not those ones I can’t live without. I hope time will unfold the real me and there will be a day I kiss this childish, self centered Fenny goodbye… It’s just so pathetic that I keep buying (or striving for) stuffs and individuals catch my eye and steal my attention in a matter of days or weeks or months. Life is much more than just days (or weeks or months) and having more things doesn’t necessarily enrich someone’s life, especially when those things are trifling and insignificant. They maybe exquisite and posh, or unmistakably interesting to die for. However, if they are not the reason you wake up each day or ones that give this life a meaning it would be fair for me to say that you should think over and over before getting yourself in the pursuit of false image and frail happiness. Because the truth is they don’t last long and it’s just a matter of time when you realize you’ve been balancing yourself on shaky grounds.
I do hope everyone of us don’t have mascara (read : baggage) we carry with us at all timesJ. Ask yourself a question : do I need it/him/her to make me complete? Most of the case the answer is NO. Well, it’s time to let go.
1 In such a contemporary world, beauty is not something you’re born with. Instead, it’s what you can afford. Literally you can buy your hair, complexion, or fix your nose. To listen to TLC’s Unpretty go to : http://song2play.com/t/tlc-3190/fanmail-14172/unpretty-187838.html
